My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Panties = found
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
