So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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