Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
can u get pink eye on your cock?
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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