I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
