Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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