FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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