I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
