...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
