I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I am naked and annoyed.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
