I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
