so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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