The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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