does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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