I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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