My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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