My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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