He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
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