And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
You were trust falling into bushes
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
