I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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