sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
