if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
