so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
