make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
