You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
