Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
The power of my boobs compel you
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
he high fived his dick after we had sex
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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