Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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