Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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