Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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