Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
