i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
