You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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