Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
3pm strippers are depressing
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
