ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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