I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
