Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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