i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Randomize
