Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Its about making memories worth repressing
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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