just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
the liver wants what the liver wants
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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