We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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