We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
