I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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