D3 body, D1 cock
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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