I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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