What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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