Can Purell be used as lube?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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