I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
