You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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