ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
