how can u be prego again
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
