the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
